Trainspot story. Trip to the unknown… Reset. Restart. Recover.

This has been a long trip. I met Jested for the first time in person last November while filming a rehearsal of Disquiet band where he was playing as a drummer. During this shoot I badly injured my my feet and ended up in Vinohrady hospital for 10 days. I heard his song TRAINSPOT for the first time in the hospital while being hooked on dripfeed, high on morphium to kill all the physical pain, full of sadness, worries & painful love. I immediately loved the song once I heard it for the first time, I wanted to escape from the hospital bed, to fly away, to dance or just simply disappear from this world but it was impossible…I was bent to the bed for the following month and was jumping on one leg with crutches til the end of the year. The long, never-ending winter has passed and many things have happened in my life – hardcore breakup & loosing a job at the same time during one cold night in Prague in the end of January – I had to touch the most painful bottom to start to live again. Slowly, all by myself, with a total emptiness both in my heart and in my head, almost broke, but accepting my destiny after all and taking all new life challenges which were standing ahead. Reset. Restart. The recovery was and still is taking a long time, it’s a long process as the memories are always here and they are so strong that it’s hard to get them out of my mind. I started to follow a wu-wei philosophy and taking what comes across to my path, not forcing anything and taking the time, just to take my life as a game, game with unknown rules, unknown destinies, unknown destinations, unknown people crossing my path… One can understand this as a release, and indeed it was, a sort of. The song followed me on my journey as I believe that music heals, and so heals any kind of creative process…Nothing else in the world could help better. I started shooting spontaneously some images in March in Prague and the idea for the music video started to crystalize slowly in my head. Just this simple idea which was reflecting my actual situation – seeing the world in its surreal contoures, feeling as a stranger with all the memories of my unfulfilled love, always having in mind Thom York’s song “Creep” with “what the hell I’m doing here, I don’t belong here” kind of feeling and Haruki Murakami’s essay “The Sound of a Train Whistle in the Night” which is all about love, loneliness & suffering (I made it into a short film while I was alone in Japan 2 years ago, when I was feeling kind of the same but in totally different circumstances). Then I went for two weeks to Israel and finished the shooting there… With a help of great, talented, creative people whom I met on my way. And the music video, therefore, is a result of this painful, inner, deliberating trip. I gave all my soul, creative energy & love to it. I hope you will like it… I feel better now. Just my feet is still not healed until now and so isn’t my heart yet but it will come, one day… (Jested told me after that TRAINSPOT is about a small boy, maybe his son? /// update as of May 2015: and I’m so happy that JESTED won a music competition and they gonna play at Colours of Ostrava and record their first album this year.)